Crystal Wishes

 

I tend to run when I feel enclosed or surrounded, that is better than fighting which I used to do. If it was perfume, loud like the music in the place, the enchantment seemed high pitched and that is why I ran away. In the order of demands this winter I can not say a woman is one. It is usually a feverish magnetic pull that I can not shake off. Anyway, early in the week I had bought the crystal after holding several in my hand. The others felt heavy and dull, but this crystal gave sensations I originally attributed to the smiling sales girl. I created my intentions almost immediately about positive transitions, but from a shadow and in spite of myself I thought of the type of mergers bankers pay for, of muted perfumes in curtained corners while a laser show and DJ fog the adjacent stage, as snow-globe figurines weep the snow of money. Wishing comes easy for everyone and we never remember what we wish for so we do not know if they come true. I am the unlucky sort that all my wishes come true, and I am stuck with the orphaned results, the pale hangover of prayer and mischief.

From where do our priorities come, and how often do they creep into the light when trying to formulate some righteous intention? If I was entirely honest with myself I must admit that I do not want a job, or anyone in my house for very long. I do not want the pressure to talk, and I just really want from a woman to have fun every so often. I put that on a dating site profile and was repeatedly e-slapped, so I have to talk a lot to have some company, being very dishonest.

When she got off work she sat with us and it was very pleasant. Soon she had put her bags which appeared full of clothes on the empty chairs. This frighted my sensibilities and was another reason I initially ran away. It was not long before the old background ghost inspired me again against myself, and I returned according to a drunk biology. If I had to name my favorite place in America it would be my little house near the lake. I have intoned very positive intentions for this place, and these wishes have created a simple and comfortable air. I try not to let girls in too often because they distract me from my work. I am a workaholic actually, my job is creating wakeful intentions that transmute dark cosmic forces. Part of my job is to travel through silence with an army of words and wishes and help nature balance the energetic scales of fortune. They won't really let me retire because apparently it is a life long position. They did not mention that when I signed up.

I helped her put her bags in the back seat and we drove home. I got the impression she would be staying awhile. I usually only eat pb&j but she made me stop at the all-night gas station for eggs and cheese, and ice cream. Delicacies she payed for herself. I noticed that we weren't talking very much and she seemed not to care, in fact there was a subtle buzz in my mind that almost felt mechanical. It was like some times when I am working following certain light streams in space and scooping up little slivers of leftover time particles. It sounded like that. They say that god expresses herself in light and vibration and sound, but that's above my pay grade.

I did not tell her about the crystal but I let her hold it. She made it into a necklace for me with silver wire and hemp rope. She said it reminded her of something but could not remember what. In the evening we would have breakfast sandwiches on toast, and we got used to being in the same space. It was some time before I noticed the changes she had made to the house. She had put her artwork on the walls over the smudges and dust. Her pictures were colorful rhythms of water and trees. Because I could not tell her about my job she did not know what I was doing all day. She thought I was meditating all the time. After the winter we drove to the mountains and visited diners for our breakfast. Sometimes we seemed to smile together for no reason and I would only notice after a long time. Then she heard me talking to the crystal.

I tried to explain that I was making wishes, but I do not think she understood. A few seasons later she packed her bags and got picked up to go somewhere. I mentioned that there were still eggs in the frig and she smiled as she went. Work was always a bit draining, but it got harder after Lucy left. I put in more and more over-time and got a really good raise. They allowed me to train a new hire to help me in the position. So I put an add in the paper:

Help Wanted

Cosmic Garbage Person

Must See Ghosts &

Cook Breakfast Sandwiches

I had a notion after some really strange folks responded to my add that maybe Lucy would want the job. I went back to where we met and brought the crystal necklace. I decided to make the wish that she would accept my offer and come home. I told the crystal that I thought Lucy was perfect for the job and wished she would take the position. I saw her waiting tables and walked over. During her break I explained the nature of the work, that she would have to help balance the scales of light, and put in order the words and dreams of living people. She politely refused and headed back to work. I figured the crystal had run out of intention-energy so on the way out I slipped it into Lucy's bag of clothes near the end of the bar.

My boss's boss’s boss sent a light memo to everyone employed with the Cosmic Play Guild. She reminded us that use of intentions was not meant for our own personal gain, and that prayers and wishes for ourselves, although they are heard at CPG, are no longer subject to response. I thought about that for a long time before I went crystal shopping. I found a very special grayish crystal. I wished into the crystal that Lucy would find a job she really loved, maybe at a diner making breakfast sandwiches. She was really good at that.